I’ve been searching through blogs and articles and everything in between about all types of chronic illness. I am starting to get the feeling that a lot of people who have these illnesses/diseases etc. and write about them feel like if they have one negative thought or don’t stay positive through a bad day that they will just fall apart.
Seems unhealthy to me. There’s always a “bright side” ending to their stories no matter how freaking bad it gets. I understand the need to stay positive, it is a great thing, but there is this thing called denial. Being positive to the point of denial is like taking any feeling of reality and just shoving it down never to see the light of day.
There are so many readers who look for guidance and stories to relate to so they don’t feel alone. It’s one of the first things I did after my diagnosis. I wanted to hear other people’s experiences and read the process they went through. It’s hard to relate to someone who is so positive they make you want to puke. You get bored and move on after a bit because you can’t relate to this person anymore.
I get it, everyone is different, but for the most part everyone gets angry or sad. Life is not perpetually happy regardless of the situation. Life is kind of gross and sad, you can’t deny it.
Take this with a grain of salt, after all, I hate everything Disney. You can’t make me like Finding Nemo or Beauty and the Beast. I am, what my boyfriend calls, an evil little woman. What I consider fun is reading about Viking history and burial rituals.
Back to my point. There is no balance anymore between positive and pessimistic. Be a good healthy skeptic. Wether you want to believe you can find some good in something or some bad in something just let it be some not all.
If you’re reading this and you have a shit chronic illness, incurable disease or just a terrible freaking life it’s ok to be angry or sad or whatever. Just don’t put yourself into denial and don’t be that person who can bring up some super awkward topic in a group of people like it’s nothing. Like ” Yeah, I used to do meth. But it’s ok I’m clean!” No, not a good topic and you can’t spin that as a positive story. That’s a conversation you have with close friends and family, not at a bar or party.
Not everyone is a hero, nor do they have to be. We’re human, we feel and life is a messy thing. Now take that fake positivity and shove it.
Your medication causes your negativity. Normal people dont feel the need to talk about how crap their life is all the time. That hurt didn’t it. The medication does that too. It is possible to control epilepsy without medication but you won’t ever see that. I was so suicidal from the meds that I found it by accident. Have a nice life. x
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